Holy shit, I can't decide which of your "hope quotes" to focus on, so I'm choosing a trilogy.
"You hope. But you fear. And then you act like both are liars."
"We are creatures of forward collapse."
"Hope for the best. Fear the worst. Laugh like a maniac in the middle."
You've basically summarized my psyche that was formed long before our current regime. I think that one reason our current predicament makes me so angry & alarmed, is that I've already lived in the upside down hypocritical chaos of cruelty, abuse, & perpetual lies disguised as Christianity. Along with wearing the shame of a sociopath who has no sense of his own shame whatsoever. I barely escaped my insane childhood & dammit I don't want to go back. And I certainly don't want to move forward with such ludicrousness at the helm. But if collapsing forward is required, I'm here for it, as a lifelong automatic literal & figurative stumbler, who needs a hand now & then to stand upright.
I honestly think that at my core, I'm an optimistic, hopeful person who was forced to develop pessimism as a shield. I remember the moment in the car (but not the exact timeline) that the shift occurred sometime between first & third grade. My mother was driving me to Salem Baptist Day School in North Carolina, which I thought at the time was a delightfully Christian & now retrospectively horrific place to receive an education. I don't recall what had happened, but I was thoroughly disappointed about something & trying with all my might not to react or cry about it. So I decided in my head that "If I never hope for anything, I won't be disappointed." (And therefore won't get in trouble for crying, being ungrateful, sinning, etc.) So with great determination this became my mantra as a child.
It's difficult to continuously act against your nature, but I was already well versed in the Christian fallacy that your life is not your own, you're born a sinner, the way you feel is wrong, yada yada, so it fit right in with what I was being taught (programmed). It also began the process of detachment from my true feelings, which made me a prime target for the abuse that later occurred, because absolute obedience to my parents was required by God.
Despite my tumultuous & contradictory upbringing & my default mode of girding my loins with a garment (So a girdle? Or the holy undergarments of the Mormans? Hmm.) of verbose humor, I do still hope that we can someday move past the clown show. (I keep thinking of the ringmaster in Moulin Rouge shouting, "EVERYTHING'S GOING SO WELL!" despite all evidence to the contrary.) I do feel the all too familiar need to pay attention, remain hypervigilant, & not shut down out of exhaustion. But if we only focus on the ringmaster, we miss the pickpocket, so to speak. So I guess we have to simultaneously listen while watching our asses.
I agree in principle, but I’m not sure anyone wants my kind of revenge assistance. As a speed of a tortoise unbalanced limper with vertigo & a latent smart mouth, I’ll likely not be on the front lines.
Unless there’s a call for someone to arm the troops with the spirited humming of inspirational k-pop tunes, hits from the 60s through 80s, & peanut butter & jelly sandwiches. Or perhaps I could be pushed around in a wheelbarrow hurling insults & unused craft supplies at whomever equates the orange menace with Jesus or mentions Armageddon (the Biblical event, not the song). Therein lies my yet to be utilized talent.
“Unhand me ye hypocrites! Thou shalt not best me in a battle of wits where the categories art the remembrance of useless song lyrics; the identification of BTS members by voice, face, & dance, despite their constant changing of hair color; Beach Boys trivia; & naming the Books of The Bible in song form! Away with thee I say!”
As Mrs. Kenderson said to Goren in Sliver Lining (S4 E8) of Criminal Intent, "Hope is for suckers, detective."
When I get my terminal diagnosis, I'll join The Terminal Army, pick my target, and do the world a favor by going out with a bang.
May your weekend/week be fab, mon Ami!
Holy shit, I can't decide which of your "hope quotes" to focus on, so I'm choosing a trilogy.
"You hope. But you fear. And then you act like both are liars."
"We are creatures of forward collapse."
"Hope for the best. Fear the worst. Laugh like a maniac in the middle."
You've basically summarized my psyche that was formed long before our current regime. I think that one reason our current predicament makes me so angry & alarmed, is that I've already lived in the upside down hypocritical chaos of cruelty, abuse, & perpetual lies disguised as Christianity. Along with wearing the shame of a sociopath who has no sense of his own shame whatsoever. I barely escaped my insane childhood & dammit I don't want to go back. And I certainly don't want to move forward with such ludicrousness at the helm. But if collapsing forward is required, I'm here for it, as a lifelong automatic literal & figurative stumbler, who needs a hand now & then to stand upright.
I honestly think that at my core, I'm an optimistic, hopeful person who was forced to develop pessimism as a shield. I remember the moment in the car (but not the exact timeline) that the shift occurred sometime between first & third grade. My mother was driving me to Salem Baptist Day School in North Carolina, which I thought at the time was a delightfully Christian & now retrospectively horrific place to receive an education. I don't recall what had happened, but I was thoroughly disappointed about something & trying with all my might not to react or cry about it. So I decided in my head that "If I never hope for anything, I won't be disappointed." (And therefore won't get in trouble for crying, being ungrateful, sinning, etc.) So with great determination this became my mantra as a child.
It's difficult to continuously act against your nature, but I was already well versed in the Christian fallacy that your life is not your own, you're born a sinner, the way you feel is wrong, yada yada, so it fit right in with what I was being taught (programmed). It also began the process of detachment from my true feelings, which made me a prime target for the abuse that later occurred, because absolute obedience to my parents was required by God.
Despite my tumultuous & contradictory upbringing & my default mode of girding my loins with a garment (So a girdle? Or the holy undergarments of the Mormans? Hmm.) of verbose humor, I do still hope that we can someday move past the clown show. (I keep thinking of the ringmaster in Moulin Rouge shouting, "EVERYTHING'S GOING SO WELL!" despite all evidence to the contrary.) I do feel the all too familiar need to pay attention, remain hypervigilant, & not shut down out of exhaustion. But if we only focus on the ringmaster, we miss the pickpocket, so to speak. So I guess we have to simultaneously listen while watching our asses.
I agree in principle, but I’m not sure anyone wants my kind of revenge assistance. As a speed of a tortoise unbalanced limper with vertigo & a latent smart mouth, I’ll likely not be on the front lines.
Unless there’s a call for someone to arm the troops with the spirited humming of inspirational k-pop tunes, hits from the 60s through 80s, & peanut butter & jelly sandwiches. Or perhaps I could be pushed around in a wheelbarrow hurling insults & unused craft supplies at whomever equates the orange menace with Jesus or mentions Armageddon (the Biblical event, not the song). Therein lies my yet to be utilized talent.
“Unhand me ye hypocrites! Thou shalt not best me in a battle of wits where the categories art the remembrance of useless song lyrics; the identification of BTS members by voice, face, & dance, despite their constant changing of hair color; Beach Boys trivia; & naming the Books of The Bible in song form! Away with thee I say!”
K-pop is a deadly weapon...
Sorry, I just added another paragraph! 😂
ZOUNDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE BITCH BOYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
There is always revenge.
Considering the current state of things, perhaps earlier is betterer...